Musings of a Teenage Sage

2006-12-02T11:35:00.000-08:00

Ello.
Lola is done! I finished training my rat named Lola, for those of you with whom I have not conversed about my dear furry friend, last night, at approximately 1:15 am. She did not complete her last exercise. Alas, I tried for hours upon hours, petting her, yelling at her, sining to her, tapping on her cage, banging on her cage, covering her cage, uncovering her cage, but no. She did not do it. But that, is ok. Because I have 91 documented attempts and that has to be worth something. And I have some lovely graphs describing the 91 attempts thanks to my dear Ben Slade who stayed up with me until the end.

I have only to take a test on Monday, finish my Psychology Notebook, write one more paper, and then it will be time for finals. Honestly, I think finals will almost be a relief in comparison to the papers/tests/rat/etc. At least I can know what to expect.

At Covenant of late, we have been discussing who looks like what type of animals. It has been determined that I look like some sort of cat, Joben looks like a turtle, Hope looks like a horse, Nathan looks like...I don't remember, Aislinn looks like a squirril or something to that extent (the cute kind), Ben looks like a golden retriever, etc. So, I would like some imput on who ya'll think I look like as well as any of the aforementioned people, as well as yourself or another mutual friends at home. This is of course, a non judgemental, non threatening, and non insulting sort of exercise, to please curb your comments in that general direction.

I am exceedingly hungry at present, but there is no food to be had other than the granola bars which are approximately three inches from left hand and which I will be partaking of quite soon.

If only writing essays went this fast, life would be so much easier. I think that I shall go now. I love you all!!!!

2006-10-11T20:49:00.000-07:00

Hi! It's midterms week and I'm writing a paper. I just finished another paper. Does anybody know who wrote "I'd Rather Have Jesus?" I thought it was Robert Murray McShayne, except that's obviously not how you spell McShayne, and I can't find it online. The internet has failed me. I am disappointed. So why am I choosing to write now? Not quite sure. Just gathering my thoughts before I proceed with the paper writing process. Everybody is freaking out here. It's ok though. We'll all live. Strange things keep happening with me and Hope, and some of them shall never be repeated to another human soul, but if you mention the fact that they exist we will both pretty much die laughing. It's that funny. So anyways, I'm done for now. Come home Heather! Call me back Micah! Claire, have you ever considered owning a rat named Lola? Joben, you're sleeping. Hey Aunt Donna! Nathan, keep working on the T shirts. I look forward to their production. Caroline, I almost called you earlier because I couldn't remember msconfig. But then I remembered. And my phone was missing at the time so it's good that I remembered. Bye guys! Love is eternal.

2006-09-09T16:05:00.000-07:00

"I bought organic shampoo!" *sob* "It smells like mixed greens. and I bought some gel that smells like citrus!" So, everyone smell the random readhead and see if she smells like like a spinache-citrus smoothie with a hint of wet dog. (That'd be the Burberry perfume. ;)

2006-08-26T20:42:00.000-07:00

Random Wal-Mart runs.
Climbing shelves to sit in random chairs.
Getting covered in pink fuzz.
Nathan getting covered in pink fuzz. (even better)
Black t shirts.
Scenic drives.
Calling 911 to report fallen trees..."no i don't know what county I'm in. no, i don't know if I'm in tennessee or ga. Yes, i'm sure that's the road. Well are you sure? I mean that's what the sign said...". Yeah.
The various drivers forcing the truck to have random convulsions at unexpected times.
Informing the girl in the fabric department that we were going to staple the curtains together.
The chipmunks version of dragostea din tei.
Heck Yes.

2006-08-22T10:28:00.000-07:00

Hey! So, first post from college! I'm having a lot of fun, but this is definately not the way it's going to be all the time. It's like summer camp, times 10. lol. Plus some like random lectures and a bunch of tests about "general Biblical knowledge," you know, about all those important facts like Ahab and Jazabelle and all that good stuff. Ahab was Jazabelle's husband right? lol. The weather is ever so unpredictable. That's always fun. And the chapel is arctic, at all times. But I like our room, and Esperanza is working now, except she's not supporting firefox which is making me upset, but w/e. I'll get that worked eventually. We have like the "O-Teams", and we do everything together, which is actually pretty fun because I'm getting to know all these random ppl who I never would have otherwise. There's this one girl, and she's 4'10". It's awesome. lol. So yeah, i'm happy, but Hope...you need to get your butt up here. But as I said before, You'll come, and then I'll never be lonely again, so I'll just enjoy it while it lasts. ;) I miss you all! Much love.

2006-08-15T21:39:00.000-07:00

There is far too much to be done before I go to school, and I feel completely overwhelmed by it all, but the scary thing is that before I know it, I'll be lying all alone in some room at school in a bunk bed. And I won't even be able to stare at the ceiling kuz I'm on the bottom, but at least I won't be able to fall off and permenantly damage myself in the middle of the night. Well, I suppose that's still not out of the realm of possibility, even from the bottom bunk, but I'd say the risk is significantly decreased. I'm going to miss all my friends so much. It's dreadfully sad. I've been spending so much time with them that I can't imagine living a whole day without them. I'm very codependant based on my last statement. lol. But still, it's sad. Life is so small when it comes down to it, but it seems so big all the time. But then there are the moments when it seems suffocatingly small and eternity is staring you in the face...I don't know. There are far too many thoughts in my head at 12:40 am. I need a diary. I keep typing things and then deleting them because I don't want the whole world to read them. That's the trouble with writing. Once I start, I feel like I might as well spill and get all out there on the page. So much for that idea. If I had a post for ever major mood I went through during the day, it would be quite remarkable. Ok. I'm going to sleep now. Life is too short to live half-heartedly.

2006-08-13T19:52:00.000-07:00

"All truth is God's truth, no matter where it is found, and we can thank him for it all." Do we like this line?
I definately don't like that the author uses the universal "she" instead of the universal "he." That's just ridiculous. I mean, if you're going to be all pc about it, do both genders (he/she), or avoid using third person singular when a gender is required, but taking it all the way to "she?" Pssshh. "In a word, if she is to act creatively and to speak with cogency and clarity to the minds of her fellows..." and again, "Every parent feels protective toward her youngsters..." I think it may actually be switching back and forth between genders in certain parts, which is even more stupid and confusing. So my first impression of Covenant literature is definately not positive, but hey, who judges a whole college by one book?
Hope, I found yet another strand of your hair. It's going to be like wound around me forever, interwoven in my clothes and in my backpack and everywhere by the time next semester is over. That's ok though. I love you.
Goodnight all. :)

2006-08-10T18:28:00.000-07:00

I was talking to my mom tonight about not putting your trust in any one person or group of people or place, and it's really interesting, because a place or group of people can make me perfectly happy for a little while, and then like the glitter fades and joy is gone, and it's like, oh they're just people, and this is just a place and this isn't what is going to make me happy. It's amazing to think about that, becuase I get all caught up in things like that, and then I walk in with expectations, and I'm left empty. I said something to my mom about how happy places were always ripped away, and she that was rather pessimistic and looked rather concerned, but I'm not upset about this fact...it's just a fact. Happy places never stay happy. They become sad and hollow and empty. And if you expect them to always be happy, you'll be let down. Maybe most people don't have happy places, but I do. What it comes down to is that unless I'm happy in Christ wherever I am, no place will ever really be happy, and I can be happy in any place, if I have Christ. So that's that, and happy places are all just facades hiding what's underneath, and what's underneath is usually not very pretty. But sometimes it's happier just to live in the delusion that it's all pretty and happy than to see things for what they really are. But that's not living in reality, and if I don't focus on reality, things end up looking very strange. Life through the eyes of Annie. Be glad you never have to experience it. It's kind of confusing. But remember guys, life is not complicated!! No!! Never complicated. Just complex.

Complicated: Containing intricately combined or involved parts; Not easy to understand or analyze. See Synonyms at complex.
Complex: Consisting of interconnected or interwoven parts; composite; Involved or intricate, as in structure; complicated.
Complicate: (v) To make or become complex or perplexing.

2006-08-09T13:18:00.000-07:00

No one in all of Peachtree City knows where to get an ethernet splitter or even how to locate one. How can this concept really be that difficult? There's a coupler and there's a splitter. All I need is a splitter. I already have a coupler. Not at RadioShack. Not at Staples. Not at Best Buy. Not even at Comp USA! The guy at RadioShack didn't even know what I was talking about what like "Whoa." So if anyone knows where to locate a splitter without having to call someone in the state of Connecticut, let me know.

2006-08-09T10:46:00.000-07:00

On Eating.

I must protest against all those who are such proponents for the cause of eating. I find the practice quite disturbing. Why would want to eat if only to feel ill as soon as the eating is completed? It defeats its own purpose simply by existing. I am very tired. I am always tired. I think I shall sleep forever and ever and never wake again. That would make me happy. No sleeping and no eating and no more dreadful caffeine. Good night. Except not.

2006-08-08T06:44:00.000-07:00

So pretty much, Heather and I listen to the same 4 songs all day at work, not for a lack of accessibility to music, but because of a strange compulsion to listen to them time after time, which means that by the end of the day, we are completely and utterly sick of them, but by the time the morning comes again, we're dying for the again. The songs are as follows:
-Lips of an Angel, by Hinder
-Better than Me, by Hinder
-Stolen, by Dashboard Confessional
-The Adventure, by Angels and Airwaves
We deviate from these four when we get seriously sick of them, but that's pretty much it. So anyways, if you ever need songs to get you through a long day at the office, or a long day anywhere, look these four up, and you too will be addicted.
I was trying to talk this morning before I had my full throttle...and I couldn't even get my sentence out. My brain wouldn't formulate the thought patterns to make my mouth move in an intelligent matter. But I am now half way through my first one, and I am thinking much more coherently now.

2006-08-03T14:14:00.000-07:00

You know you've been on the computer too much when you mistake in the real world and you're first thought is Ctrl+Z.

2006-08-03T07:04:00.000-07:00

This post is dedicated to all the emails sent trying to fix the problems that you get blamed for, and all the time spent on the phone going, "No, I cancelled that yesterday. Give me the credit number!" And to all the piano students who don't bring their music. And to all the times you're randomly handed a job you have no clue about. And then you pull it off, despite everything.

Would someone please teach me how to do a round kick? I can block a direct knife blow, but I can't do a round kick. lol.

2006-08-01T13:36:00.000-07:00

"Don't say things like that! I'm not going to be pacifistic about it. I'm going to hit you upside down the head."
~H
Office quote of the day.

2006-08-01T09:15:00.000-07:00

I lost.

2006-07-27T12:59:00.000-07:00

Farewell, my friends! I'm going to be out of town for a few days, and if all goes well I shall return tanner than ever. My minutes are shot, so only call me during the day if you have T-Mobile, and if you don't, call me in the night or on the weekend. :) Much love.

2006-07-26T18:55:00.000-07:00

There's a wasp infestation in my room.
Krav Maga was really fun tonight. I did it in Fayetteville instead of PTC, and I think I might like it better. It had more of an experienced feel whereas the other one had more of a young/fun feel. I didn't feel like I was more experienced but that the instructor was. And there were definately no "matter of interpretation" comments going on, which was very nice. Both classes were enjoyable, but I feel like I got more out of tonight's. I loved last week's too tho so we'll see.
So in my ample readiness for college life, I have one pillow and seven washcloths. Got the sleeping and cleanliness covered. The fact that I own like four long sleeve shirts and that I'm going to a snowy, icy, windy, freezing school is going to need some work.
I think I just found another strand of your hair, Hope.
Sin really has perverted our world you know. Everything that should be good isn't. But I'm much too tired to think deeply. See, sin has perverted even sleep and consciousness, blurring the lines between them so that one interupts the other and neither can be fully seperate from the other. I'm going to see if I can let sleep win the battle at this point, tho it annoys me to no end that my ability to think and function should be infringed upon by something like weariness. Good night.

2006-07-24T17:56:00.000-07:00

And I'm at home making travel reservations!
Something is wrong with this picture.

2006-07-22T13:08:00.000-07:00

The words, "Oh, she's 0 for 7," bring such a smile to my face.
Oh and, "So how long have you been clean?" Yeah. That really does it for me too.
I am so out of the doghouse. That's all I can say.

Oh, and this is for Micah--You're beautiful, it's true.

2006-07-21T08:21:00.000-07:00

My knuckles are busted. Heck yes.
(evil laugh)

2006-07-18T19:26:00.000-07:00

So Ric was pretty much spazzing out the other day over this gun. He was like, "Oh man, at annual training, I got to shoot a 50 caliber sniper rifle, man! This thing was so awesome. I could shoot and then (insert gun terminology here. something to extent of, take the recoil and then get the rifle setup again on its bipod) and I could count to 4, like 1...2...3...4, and then BOOM! The tank would blow. It was so awesome. Do you have any idea how long a bullet is for one of these things??" Proceeds to show me the length of the bullet, and finds all sorts of pictures of the rifle, takes me to the Barrett website, etc. "Beautiful. It's just beautiful."
It was kinda funny. And thus begins Annie's education of guns.

2006-07-18T16:39:00.000-07:00

Hey guys.

So pretty much, if anybody has any travel needs coming up, give me a call. I had a very busy day at work scheduling like nine million flights and cars and hotels and directions for like so many ppl, all of their schedules having to coincide and then speed off in opposite directions to the next location where their presence is demanded. Maybe one of these days, I'll actually get to go stay in one of the hotel rooms which I so adeptly book. But actually, it probably wouldn't be that fun to walk around in a suit talking to clients all day and trying to impress everyone, but sometimes it seems like it would beat sitting in that chair being ready to answer the phone and speed off into another flurry of activity trying to get everything done before the deadline which is ever so quickly approaching. I got a lovely five minutes of lunch today. Those five minutes were very precious to me. lol. I actually love my job. Nowhere else could I get this diverse of an experience with multifaceted sides of life and stuff and still stay in the same office. But ya know, everything gets a little frustrating after awhile. And now, I think that I shall go run. Becuase my fingers are typing very quickly and I'm thinking that I should put this energy into the treadmill. You know, I wonder what kind of things you could discover about people if you could like gather all the stress and energy they exerted into the treadmill or their outlet of choice and then like analyzed it. I mean, everybody has an outlet, and that outlet probably actually knows a whole lot more about that person than anyone else does. So that's my insight on the profundity of treadmills for the day.
Oh and I'm becoming a walking encyclopedia of airport codes, so if you're ever wondering...jk.

2006-07-16T19:23:00.000-07:00

Micah Cauble. This post is dedicated to the one and only. Without Micah, I would not have gone to family camp. Without Micah, family camp would have been dull as blazes. Without Micah, I would never have gone that far out in the water and felt perfectly fine about it. Without Micah, there would be no memories of him running across the parking lot to the porta potty with a bag of maggots, in a bathing suit none the less. Without Micah, there would have been no running on the beach, or star gazing, or sparkly stuff in the water!! Without Micah, there would be no stories to tell at all. And so, with that thought, I end this post, but let all the world know that Micah OWNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-07-16T13:18:00.000-07:00

So I went to the beach this week. It was really fun. Family camp is always relaxing and such, even tho my family wasn't there. I had Hope so that was awesome. We had fun. It was a precursor for what is to come next year...actually next month. Well maybe it wasn't a precursor...more like hopefully it was a precursor, but we had fun. A grand time. ha ;) "I don't give a flying fajitar about him, and he doesn't give a flying fajitar about me!" That was our line for the week. So they announced today that the food was the best yet this year, and i'm thinking, if this was the best, how can i possibly not have any recollection of the food from the years previous? I decided to go to camp at the very last minute, like at 1:30 Sunday afternoon I started calling ppl and we left Monday morning at 8 am. So, that was fun. And everything came together and the Lord really worked it for me to go. And it was good that I went. Sometimes things work out differently than you might expect and for different reasons, but it was definately for the best and I feel much more refreshed that I did before. My self defense class yesterday was quite fun. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I think it would be fun to take a year and pursue all the things I've always wanted to do, like learn to fight/defend myself and take ball room dancing (well I haven't always wanted to do that one, but I do now,) and write and read, and run, and get better at the piano and learn a bunch of songs and all that kind of stuff. But then I would fall behind on my real education...the one I'm a year ahead in. lol. So I'm guessin I'll just do all that stuff while I do the real education thing, and stay all busy and stuff. That'll be fun. And I want to travel all over the place. I want to go to Rome and London and Paris and Tokyo and Australia and the Phillipines and South Africa and maybe some country in South America. That would be fun. But alas, there are those dreadful things in life called responsibilties. Sometimes I wonder why in the world I push myself so hard to reach these educational and vocational goals instead of just doing the things I really want to do and enjoying it and learning through all that. But I guess life isn't always the way you want it to be, and if I'm supposed to do those things, I'll do them one day. But I'm still waiting. And I would take hundreds of pictures of everything. It's amazing how much more beautiful things can be come if you view them through the perspective of a camera, like thinking about how you can make a picture beautiful. When we were doing camp a few weeks ago, we went to this flower nursery, and normally I don't like those places, but I was walking around taking pictures of all the girls and the flowers, and the girls with the flowers, and it was raining, so there were water droplets on everything, and I really ended up enjoying it. So I think that would be fun. And through a picture, a memory can live on. That sounds mushy. Anywayz. I guess it comes to dreams or goals, and whether your dreams line up with your goals and if you're willing to change your dreams to match your goals or vice versa. And I guess whichever you choose will win out, becuase everyone has dreams, but it's the goals that win out in the end. Since I'm leaving for Covenant in a month, I'm guessing that the dreams are going to take the backseat for a while longer. And that's probably the way it should be.

2006-06-16T11:18:00.002-07:00

I, the one who doesn't run.... wait
I, the one who don't run?
Me, the one who doesn't run..??
Me, I don't run....
I don't run.

2006-06-14T09:24:00.000-07:00

My Broken Songs

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times
but somehowI want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Laughing with your pretty mouth
Laughing with your broken eyes
Laughing with your lover's tongue
In a lullaby

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wanted you to know
I love the way you laugh
I want to hold you high and steal your pain

Kuz I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
Kuz I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We were drawn from the weeds
We were brave like soldiers
Falling down under the pale moonlight
You were holding to me
Like a someone broken
And I couldn't tell you but I'm telling you now
Just let me hold you while you're falling apart
Just let me hold you so we both fall down

Fall on me
Tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you, forever in me
Ever the same
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Highlight of today: sitting on the brick steps outside of work in the sun, eating my peach and my strawberries. :)

2006-06-05T07:40:00.000-07:00

I firmly believe in invisible door hinges.

(guess who said that one.)

2006-05-31T10:44:00.000-07:00

Annie: So I should be shot?

Heather: No, I don't believe in corporal punishment.

2006-05-31T07:59:00.000-07:00

Heather: I can't imagine what it would be like if we ever end up fighting over a guy. seriously, it's gonna be really bad.
Annie: I'd give him to you.
Heather: You would not, and I wouldn't take him.
Annie: Yes I would! If you really liked him, I would!
Heather: No, I think we'd just have to like destroy him. Terminate him or something, because, otherwise, it would be bad.

2006-05-30T06:59:00.000-07:00

Meth, Meth, Metha...Methamphetamines!!!

What Kind of Pasta is That???

2006-05-25T19:39:00.000-07:00

Joben: Some people go to Six Flags. I just go to Wal-Mart with Annie.

2006-05-22T10:39:00.000-07:00

And the new hit single from the New Gooses!
Mother's Bumpers!!!!
"When all you got left is mom,
bump along, bump along,
just to make it through.
And even when your cocoa's gone,
bump along, bump along like I know you do."

2006-05-22T10:29:00.000-07:00

Heather: Carrots come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes.
Annie: So do humans.
Heather: And thus concludes our anatomy lesson for the day.

2006-05-22T09:46:00.000-07:00

Heather: Maybe you can go to like a sew-down or something.

2006-05-18T13:27:00.000-07:00

Ric's Life Lessons: Pearls of Wisdom

1. Study with a pencil in your hand.
2. Marry up, and keep it on the down low.
3. Always look for the dotted line.
4. Don't be afraid of your microwave.

Latrice:
1. Marry for love the first time.
2. And if it doesn't work out, marry for money the second time.

2006-05-18T11:21:00.000-07:00

Heather, during Ric's education of modern music: Oh! I wonder if he knows about My Humps!

2006-05-17T08:10:00.000-07:00

Ric: I weep for the future of our country
Heather: But WE are the future of our country!
Ric: That's why I weep.

2006-05-16T13:51:00.000-07:00

Heather: I'm not aristocratic.
Annie: Yeah you are, babe.
Heather: Well it's only because I was born into a family of nobles.
lol

2006-05-15T10:49:00.000-07:00

"This is gonna be a long summer." -Heather

(Annie singing the chipmunks part of Lonely)

2006-05-14T14:02:00.000-07:00

Notes from the trip.

I now officially respond to the name Einna (my name backwards, pronounced E-na).
Never entrust the future of your sunburn status to an 8 year old. I came out relatively unscathed though.
Hermit crabs were not meant for the water.
Always make the best of your sleeping conditions. no elaboration. lol...
I can go for a week without drying my hair, even when a hair dryer is available.
I'm trigger happy.
Method #3 for getting members of the opposite sex to leave me alone: have a child. Anywhere I went with Annie Kate, people didn't check me out or do anything inappropriate. Me with guy at Aeropostale: Me: Can you open one of those dressing rooms for me? Guy: Oh yeah sure.. (Opens door. Looks down. Sees stroller.) Oh. Did you want to take the stroller in with you?
It was very effective. Maybe I could even adopt a child so as to avoid a guy in the process of obtaining a child as well! This method is up for scrutiny.
So, I'm tan and happy and rested. I start work tomorrow. Haven't worked in like three weeks, so that'll be fun.
I heard some news on the trip that made me think about the brevity of life and how good my life is and has been. It made me with that I could change so many things and so many people and wake them up to see the path that they're on and where it leads. A clear picture is before them, but I just don't think that even this will be enough to show the light. I mean, God can do anything. He can use anything. He can use something little, or He can use something huge like this, but I can so easily see it being changed to be used as something else. I don't know. I just am thankful that He woke me up when He did and that now I can see the light. Sometimes I doubt if it shines through me at all, though, but I know it's there, even if I can't see it, because my life is not what it was, and it is not what it could be, so I am eternally grateful. I will just pray that one day, things will be as they should be, even if I'm not there to see it.
Bye ya'll.

2006-05-05T07:45:00.000-07:00

Note to Self: Packing all of one's stuff for a week long trip right before you have to leave is an unwise course of action.
Staying out to til midnight after being up late every night studying for finals is also an unwise course of action.
Michael Douglas is not a very good actor.
Batteries are difficult to find whenever you need them.
Ipods take a long time to charge.
Running for long periods of time causes one to become attached to one's running shoes.
Seeing people with short hair will cause one to want to chop all of one's hair off.
It is difficult to find cds appropriate for children under the age of 13.
After extended studying, getting out of the car without a backpack can cause one to feel as though an appendage has been left behind.
Friends can be made in the most dire of circumstances.
Annie Kate is going to be very heavy.

I am very happy to be done.
Running 4.5 miles may cause blisters and soreness, but it produces an incredible sense of accomplishemnt and well being.
My room is messy.
Soffees are the best.
Bending over backwards is very thereputic, especially in the IC building.
The stairs are faster than the elevator.
I need a tan.
Trying to tell me not to drive when I am tired is a very bad idea.
Librarians can be quite indignant at times.

Love to all.

2006-04-30T18:48:00.000-07:00

And she's said that you weren't true and life's not blowin her kisses thanks to you!!!!!!! I wanna know what you thinkin!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!! Hyper off the walls. You have no idea. they say you never know what you got til it's gone. wooowwwww. i wish i could like save some of this energy and like store up some of this energy and use it later. But no...it's all here now!!! And let me tell youi'm using it. Man i need to go running. Tomorrow. I'm goin for forever. Try and stop me. Hey sista go sista....she said hello, hey joe....mocha choca lata ya ya...creole lady marmalade!!!!! buncha french stuff that I ain't gonna translate for you kuz you don't wanna know.....more...More...MORE!!!! you know i have yet to take advantage of any of the priveledges that i get now that i turn 18. Maybe i should. i refuse to acknoledge that tomorrow will ever be here. Heck no. It's way more fun to live in the moment than to anticipate all the stuff that is to come, because in case you've never noticed a lot of bad stuff is often to come and the stuff you think will be fun never is as fun as you think, so i think we should just have as much fun in the moments that we're instead waiting around. what's the deal with my brain? Why am I so obviously insane?? i think i'm bipolar. dude it's awesome. lol. if you fling your head around too much your headphones will fall out. i'm gonna go to work tomororw. man yeah. work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and starting after the beach I get to be there like all the time!!!!!! And then, when I'm done, i get to go to the gym!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love the gym!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Listen to your heart....no don't it's a bad idea. Hope just said that micah passed all his hyperness to me temporarily. we can only hope. Or maybe it's natural. who knows. I'm just happy. who care about anything else. :) La la la la. I don't give a beep if you're lookin at my beep kuz it don't mean a thing if ya lookin at my beep. i'ma do my thing while your playin with your beep ha hahahaa. I love Fort Minor. Fort Minor is awesome. I think hip hop is my new favorite kind of music. at least for driving. "Look at me. Can you tell I'm carrying a concealed banana?" I love talking to Hope...she tells me the most interesting stories. ;) lol. I gotta go.

2006-04-28T18:31:00.000-07:00

If you're a male, leave me alone. I'm sick and tired of you. And that's that.

2006-04-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

Hello. Have you ever wondered what makes life interesting? if it's the moments that blow your mind that carry you along or if it's all the moments in between? or if it's the dream of what could be? You can live life here and now or you can live life for what could be. it's a strange thought, because having hope for the future is good, but living for what is to come is bad, but living blind to what is to come is also bad. where is the medium? How, when there are two weeks left of school am i supposed to live here and now when all i want lies on the other side of two weeks? and yet what i want will not be as fulfilling as what i might imagine it will be. if you think one thing will make you happy, it will not fulfill your expectations, and sometimes the things you think will be the least enjoyable end up being the most. Life is strange like that, full of contradictions and things that define reason. Greatness in the eyes of man is not greatness in the eyes of God. The things the world despises, sinners and weak people, are the people that God chooses to use to build his kingdom. How does that work? It defies reason. Or perhaps reason has been skewed by sin. Perhaps reason is something other than that which we understand, and we will never understand until heaven. or maybe God just chooses the people you would least expect. I do not know. We were not meant to know. It's the not knowing that keeps us guessing, keeps us trying. "Kuz i am falling into grace, to the unknown to where you are, and faith makes everybody scared. it's the unkown, the don't know that keeps me hanging on and on to you." Maybe if we knew we'd be too scared. If we could see the end result, we'd never make the mistakes that let us learn. If we could see the end result, we'd never believe that God could pull us through some trial that makes us more like Him. Maybe it's better to be blind, to trust, to not know. Maybe it's better to just give in and be led, to trust and believe, because if we knew, life would be miserable. The good days would be ruined by the knowledge of the bad ones. Sometimes i think joy is a choice. it's forcing yourself to be like, this is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. Sometimes, that's easy to say. Sometimes, it's really hard. Sometimes it has to be forced, like I Will rejoice and be glad in it. Sometimes it's like an overflow a praise from the heart.
Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in his wonderful face, and the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.